Thursday, January 22, 2009

Doggy Shower

Those two words strung together in the human point of view usually means some kind of party to celebrate an occassion, which usually entails much food (*drool*), a chosen crowd of people and presents (more food?). Them humans have more than many occasion to throw showers, birth of new baby,newly engaged, newly divorced, even moving in a new house is an occasion to throw a shower!

Unlike the human happy occassion of 'showers' (cleansing rituals included), the term 'doggy shower' - two simple words strung together usually means the dreaded shower i.e. being tied to a pole (so we can't run away), having to bear the chilly waters (brrrr!) and worst of all being shampoo-ed or soaped ... which usually means a thorough scrub down by the likes of BIG CHIEF so we (canines) come off smelling horridly sweet *bleah!*

The BIG CHIEF obviously doesn't appreciate the art of yours-canine-ly acquiring that certain 'doggy eu de toilette'. Our signature is our smell i.e. 'Tuffy the GREAT was and is here to stay!'. The stronger the fragrance, the better! It's how one exerts dominance, maintain and extend one's terroritories (why do you think I spend so much time watering the telephone poles?!?).

Unlike the human conveniences of smells-that-come-in-a-bottle (they call 'em parfum or some sort of fumes ...), our signature doggy aroma (no canine smell is alike) is an art which each dog take great pains to cultivate and nurture over time. It's similar to the human process of baking a cake. A little bit of this, a little bit of that, stir them all together and wait...

Likewise, a signature smell is a collection of smells, some from the watery leftover of the yellow and blue rubbish truck that I chase every Tuesday and Friday mornings, bits from a patch of grass over in the corner of the garden, some sand, some soil, something dead, something alive, something yummy ... all that put together (in various different proportions and time frame) and voila have together a personalized signature smell! Tuffy, TOP DOG, Lord of Dog Woods.

A good bake or cook that cannot be hurried (so the BIG CHIEF tells me all the time), likewise, a good doggy aroma needs to be simmered and stewed ...

And when BIG CHIEF comes along and decides that we all need good scrub down so we'd all be uniformly sweetly smelling (YUCK!) of some horrid dog shampoo she bought somewhere it's a huge canine disaster for any dog in Dog Woods. Its a gross encroachment to a Canine Liberties to SMELL, I say!

Despite being 'Smell-Less', I dare say the scrub down was rather invigorating. The BIG CHIEF sure knows how to give a good massage ... I like best being towelled dried ... but shhhh! don't tell her I told you so ...

Dog-Forbid she'd get ideas of showering us lot daily!

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