Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Hush(-ed) Puppy(ies)

It's a famous brand of shoes - Hush Puppies (so am made to understand ...). For some reason the producers of the shoes have marketed it such they have a Basset Hound (only HALF as beautiful as myself ...) to be the 'FACE' of the brand ...

And because of their marketing success all Basset Hounds - your LORDSHIP included, are ignorantly termed as 'Hush Puppy(ies)' by our human counterparts. 'Ohhhhh a HUSH PUPPY!' (indeed!*rolls eyes*)

Let me enlighten you, gentle readers, that there is nothing HUSH-ed about this Puppy. I have such BOW-WOW Power that's enough to rile up any neighbourhood - small and large! No microphones included. That's how LOUD and THUNDEROUS my PONDERFUL barks are!!

Take for example the occasion where I took great pains in professing my undying LOVE to a certain 'Lady In Season'. I was so very much 'Dog-spired' I launched into great poetic length and volume about my Puppy Love for her that even the human legend, Omar Khaiyyam can't rival! Of course, I made sure that EVERYONE in Dog Woods and beyond (including those on the other end of the telephone line ... where-ever they were calling from) heard my glorious proclaimations BOW-WOW LOVE.

'Twas unfortunate that there ended BIG CHIEF's appreciation for my Barking Prowess. She was so incest by my never-ending voluminous Barks of LOVE (could have earned me a place in the Guiness Book of Records if she was more cooperative!) she got me a muzzle.

But ah, no mere muzzle will defeat the GREAT Tuffy, Lord of Dog Woods when he's dog-spired by LOVE! I cleverly chewed through muzzle (in no time) and resumed my glorious proclaimations of Puppy Love.

BIG CHIEF, am afraid, is also one not easily deterred. Upon discovery that I had chewed through my muzzle, she produced yet another ... muttering something about having some restful respite (even if it were brief) when I was chewing through muzzle instead of BOW-WOW-ing in LOVE.

And so the power struggle ensued. The thunderous Bow-wow-wow-wow!!-muzzle on-muzzle chewed-Bow-wow-wow-wow!! I assure you that there's nothing HUSH-ed about this canine-human confrontation. The 'tussle' went on for days ... I would have WON had it not been for losing my voice.

Much too BIG CHIEF's glee (and the neighbour's relief). I daresay, possibly also much for my own good too - since the BIG CHIEF (being at leashed ends) was planning to do something drastic about my 'Family's Jewels' - with the help of the vet. (Dog Forbid!!)
But all ends well. I'm not 'Hushed Pupp-ied' but the GREAT TUFFY, LORD OF DOGWOODS!! I've toned down a notch -now that I got the attentions of 'Lady In Season'; BIG CHIEF and my other canine subjects are happy that peace has returned to Dog Woods (apparently, I over-did it on the length and volume of Poetic Bow-wows), AND the Vet is left to practice on some other poor unwitting canine ...

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